Bluegrass music partners take toilet paper shortage and roll with it

Spirit of the Bluegrass

JESSAMINE COUNTY, KENTUCKY (WDKY-TV)– We’ve all seen the bare shelves at supermarkets, as people have grabbed up hand sanitizers, bleach and plastic gloves. But one item has been scarcest of all– toilet paper.

What’s frustration to some is inspiration to others.

For more  than 25 years, Mike Carr and Mike Hammon have performed together as The Moron Brothers. Folks at bluegrass festivals love their serious songs about God and country, and silly ones about fishing and food.

And their fans tolerate their corny jokes, reminiscent of a Hee Haw epsiode.

The Moron Brothers, who go by the stage names “Lardo” and “Burley,” often flush their lyrics out of the headlines. So when they witnessed the great TP shortage of 2020, they had to roll with it.

Carr said,  “I thought Lord mercy, why are people fighting over that stuff. They’re just going to throw it away.”

So they wrote a song that offers alternative ways to take care of business.

One verse goes: ” I’ve used weeds and leaves and a handful of grass, all kinds of ways you can clean yourself; when the new Sears catalog came out, we was all glad. In the summertime when sweet corn was ripe, we’d save every cob for a really good wipe. Toilet paper to us was something that the rich folks had.”

The song also warns about the dangers of using poison ivy as a TP substitute.

As soon as the team posted the song on their Facebook page, it was clogged with comments of support and people sharing their memories of using outhouses and going without luxuries such as a roll of Charmin.

The old pals say they’re not making fun of a health crisis, just hoping to soften a rough situation.

 “It is serious, but something like this can take your mind off it for a few minutes and make you forget about it and maybe help you through the day,” said Hammon.

If laughter is the best medicine, these morons are pretty smart– like doctors with the prescription to wipe away some stress.

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